Woes Always before the Holiday Season

Every year before the holiday season something negative always happens provoking a serious cash flow setback, hampering any kind of real holiday spirit and totally destroying Christmas spirit I had prior to bad news I may receive.

I know holidays are more about the gathering of family and sharing of things to be thankful for and the blessing to have another year to look forward to and hope things get better and everything works it's way out for the best.

I think about the story of JOB in the bible about all the things taken from him. Loved ones, his lively hood and he never once would turn against god and say anything bad against him.

I constantly feel in this position and I can't say I haven't said bad things towards god and did the things we all do on a reocurring theme of why me and what did I do to deserve so much mysery.

I guess the only answer I can come up with is i'm no where as strong minded as JOB was and i'll never beable to find the good things out of negative things that may find me all the time. It's kind of like the person that gives to charity all the time and always expecting a good thing in return.

I give my fair share to charity all year long and I never expect to get things in return, but at times it's hard to swallow all the things you do to help nothing ever in return good ever comes back but more woes.

I'm not JOB and i'll never be able to handle the kind of woes he was put through by satan and how god told satan job you will never break cause his strong will and faith in me.

My faith is low and hope seems far and inbetween. My mind is exhausted and sometimes I have no clue where the road of life is dragging me too. I suffered a mental breakdown over the summer after a long drinking binge and was ready to just call it quits in the life department but the only thing the steered me away was I love my children and refused to give in to suicide and leaving my children fatherless.

Sometimes it just takes another opinion of one who deals with the same kind of sorrow and listening to another case if you have your own woes on the holidays your story or comments are welcome here.